Memory Book

If you've read the blog for a while, or followed me on any social media you would know I lost my mom to lung cancer when I was 16 years old. She was just 48. It's something I don't often talk about, but when I do (her birthday, anniversary of death etc) I can sometimes get a bit carried away in regards to it.

I'm not sure why but I still don't think I've fully processed the whole entire thing. I was in a weird place when she died, I was angry at her for getting sick - she smoked so I blamed the whole thing on her. I wasn't nice, at all. But even now, almost 13 years later and I still think she may walk in that front door one day. Kinda sad, and a bit scary considering she has been gone a while.

Anyways, I have kept in touch with her best friend that she was so close with for 20+ years, who I grew up very close with. We speak often, and would visit often when I lived back home. Now she lives 2.5 hours away in the town I used to live and every single year I've forgotten her Birthday. Sure I have 6 kids and am busy, but that is no excuse. She always remembers my kids on all holidays and Birthday's so this year I made it my mission not to forget hers!

I spoke with her on Mother's Day and I flat out asked her again when her Birthday is. June 17th she says with a snicker and tells me "Your mom always thought it was in May too!" - oops! Totally thought I had forgotten it, but was thrilled I hadn't.

I decided on a photo book from Shutterfly. At first I had planned to make the book with photos of my kids, but now that she has her own Grandbabies I didn't want to step on any toes, or anything so I got the idea to make a memory book for her of my mom. My mom loved her dearly, and they were always on the phone, visiting at each others houses or having coffee. She delivered the eulogy at my mom's funeral and was basically the only person who had promised to make sure I'd be okay that actually did just that. She was my rock. She had also told me she has 1 photo of my mom, one! That's it - so I knew I had to do this!

So yesterday, I made the book. I was a little hesitant because a few months ago we had a flood in our basement and all of my photo albums from when I was a child got ruined. Badly, water damaged and ruined.. Luckily, I found 2 albums that were hiding in my bedroom closet. 1 my grandma had made me, and 1 from my mom and dads wedding. It was perfect.

I decided to make the book photos and friendship quotes. Ones that could relate to them, and how much she meant to my mom. The program kept telling me "This photo is low quality" but I couldn't really help it as I was limited with the photos I had, not to mention had to use photos of photos. BUT, I'm hopeful it will turn out. If not, Looks like she may end up with a personalized Erin Condren address book!

Going through the photos brought back a lot of memories. Mostly wonderful, teary memories that I hope to one day be able to share with my kids as they grow. I hope my moms best friend likes this gift. I was a little unsure at giving someone a memory book for a Birthday but I wanted to give her something special, meaningful and that she would appreciate. She has 1 photo of my mom so I think this is something she will cherish.

Here's just a few of the photos I decided to put in the book...

She is missed.